A (the) Women’s Day

I had started collecting inputs for this piece almost a year back. My aim was to attempt and create a generational and gender progress chart in the landscape and perspectives pertaining to Women’s issues, especially in the workplace. Then, I did not have an original opinion to offer. I wish I could say that I have spent the last year contemplating and introspecting what it means to be a woman in the corporate world, I did not, honestly feel the need to.  Now that another Women’s Day has come and gone, just one of those days where I have hugged and wished and chatted with other women, ‘celebrating’ this day.  The spirit of it, feels lost.

Three events that happened today that struck me, one was a snide remark by male colleague that today we (the women) can walk “chauda ho kar” (puffed up), another was lack of clear understanding by any woman why Women’s Day is celebrated (I was part of this embarrassingly uninformed group), and lastly the inability or unwillingness of 10 women in an office of 60 men to sit down one day together for lunch to share food and conversation.

Male Bashing is and excellent sport besides being spectacularly easy (they make it so), I can write a thousand clever words on the subject which will elevate the readability of this entry. Unfortunately, it is not the answer, the irrefutable truth is that women are a minority in any workforce. Male opinions, as staggeringly uninformed as they might be, affect the quality of our work-life.  And the amount of resentment laced in that remark (walking 'puffed' up) and the prompt defensive justification when it wasn’t received in good humour are quite telling of the pervasive insensitivity and sheer lack of consideration for women. Put simply, men need to learn how to talk to women without being asses. There are a thousand shades of disrespect, and it comes in all shapes and sizes.

Another hurdle is that women don’t understand what women’s issues are, and very few actually care. Though, it does makes excellent drawing room conversation, and apparently is the ‘in’ thing to chat about. After all from Shabana Aazmi to Hillary Clinton, everyone seems to be talking about it. Words like 'empowerment', 'work-life balance', 'breaking the glass ceiling' have a nice sound and roll off the tongue quite easily. Women’s Day has become a sort of vacuous Valentine’s Day version of the concept, women wish each other, write mushy messages, exchange gifts, go out in packs and enjoy freebies at malls and restaurants. Without pausing to reflect why and what this day is meant to accomplish, which makes it, as a friend puts it “a mere farce of a day”.

“There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women” Madeline Albright has been quoted to say, I hope it doesn’t imply that we have to help ‘all’ women. Because, in that case we are doomed to roast till all eternity, all of us. Very few women believe in Gender Solidarity, women regard each other as competition. Unlike men, we don’t band together, we don’t believe in getting to know each other outside work, male colleagues go out for drinks together, but women don’t go out shopping together. We don’t think to take a younger female colleague under our wing, neither do we think of picking up the slack for another women in need.

An opiniated, but un-informed speech from a soap box is the last thing this day needs. Therefore, in my humble opinion, the best thing we can do on Women’s Day is prefix it with “just another”  rather than “the”. And that is a place to start.